Vegas baby and confusion ensues

Some things are exciting, some things aren't and some are just plain confusing.

Exciting.
Booked tickets to Vegas in February for my buddy Matt's bachelor party. It's with a bunch of guys I really don't know, but it is going to be a blast. Vegas is always fun. With this group it should be really, really fun. The goal as it usually is in Vegas is to stay out of jail and not lose too much money.

Things that aren't.
I've reached a level of confusion I'm not totally sure about. A lot of things that I know I shouldn't do, but continue to do. It's part of the process I suppose. Part of life. I'm not discontent at the moment, but I'm certainly not content. I'm in a weird place where I feel like I should stay and at the same time I feel like I should go.

Things that are confusing.
The main one is women. I'm not the first, but I have no idea what in god's name they want, what they don't want and why they do what they do. I have an inkling I may never know. But it's been a relatively confusing period on multiple fronts. This girl, that girl, new girl, old girl etc. I just have no idea about women. The minute I think I know something about them, everything changes.

What else.
I've been writing and reading a lot. This has broadened my horizons quite a bit. It's made me think about a lot of things differently. Read some good stuff and some really bad stuff.

Big Gee's friends were in town for most of the holiday's. It was fun. They're all good dudes and we did some righteous rocking. One day in particular where I consumed one too many Milwaukee Selects. It is in fact the worst beer I've ever had. But I continued to drink it. In fact if you do a google search, this beer doesn't even have a home page. Neither does the brewery. That's how bottom barrel bad it is.

New Year's Eve was fun. I didn't rock as hard as I could have and didn't drink as much as humanly possible. All in all, it was sort of what I expected. New Year's has traditionally been a letdown. The last one where I had a tremendously fun time was when it turned to 2000. Of course then I was 16 and got into a bunch of bars in Vail. That was a fun time.

What else. I continue to run into the old bear trap. When I think I'm out, I'm not. When I think I should do one thing, I do the other. This involved a conversation with an old friend. It was a good conversation, certainly. One of the better ones I've had in a while in fact. I expected that. But it feels like it drew me back into a situation I don't want to be in. One where I want one thing, but know I can't have it, but still want parts of it. Confusing? Absolutely. Plus I think Ole' Kev is going to punch me right in the pills the next time he sees me. But I don't know what to do. The minute I think I'm on my way to being fine, then I'm not. I really have no idea what to do. It just keeps getting more and more confusing.
But, what in the hell can you do, besides keep on keeping on. Things eventually work out. They always do. It's just not this easy being confused. I just wish things would all make sense, but I'm not the only one that feels that way.

Other than that I've been trying to think of new things to do in 2009.
I want to pick up a new hobby. I haven't decided on this yet, but I'm starting to look at things. I want to find somewhere totally sweet to visit that I haven't been to yet. Ideas include Montreal so far. I certainly want to be less confused about things. Also I think I'm going to start volunteering more. I used to do this all the time, but haven't done it a lot recently. Count it.

Hope everyone had a good New Year.